Happy Thoughts for the New Year

It's New Year's Eve.  2014 is coming to a close tonight.  This time of year always causes me to pause and reflect.  I'm not one to make grand resolutions.  I've read the statistics and most resolutions don't last beyond Valentine's day.

I refuse to be a statistic. 

Instead, I look back over last year and think of the fun times, the difficult times, the things that worked well, the things that didn't work so well.  I take note of these things and then gather up my experiences and invest them into the new year.  What have I learned that will help me achieve some new goals in the next 365 days?

New beginnings can happen at any time of the year.  Any life change is a great time to reflect and start anew.  Marriage, divorce, birth, death, sickness, graduation, mountains, valleys.  It's refreshing to give yourself permission to start over.  To clear the slate.  Put the past where it belongs and look forward to possibilities.

Here's a few events that happened to me in 2014.

• January - Studied minimalism and got rid of tons of stuff.  Went all natural with my diet.
• February - Made all our food from scratch.
• March - Celebrated weddings and babies with our friends.  Suffered large amounts of snow and cold.
• April - The flu overtook us and the first signs of spring emerged.
• May- Closed the school year. Went to family reunion. Planted a garden.
• June - Celebrated 14 yr anniversary. Entertained lots of kids. Another family reunion. My best friend moved away.
• July - Feeling very lonely.  Withdrew to only spend time with my family.  Started our 2 week vacation.
• August- Enjoyed an incredible vacation to Kentucky! Didn't want to come home.
• September - Still in a funk.  Started the school year.
• October - Threw a fancy spa party for my daughter's 10th birthday.  Met the governor of Maine.  Organized a fall party for the children at church.
• November - My sister got divorced and my brother had brain surgery.  Thanksgiving at our house.
• December - Celebrated my son's 13th birthday. Heavily involved in Christmas events at church.  Trying to remain sane.

Some good, some bad.  I eventually came out of my funk.  I'm pretty sure I've traced it to hormones in the birth control I started taking in March.  I gave it 6 months to even out and it didn't.  So I went off again.  Nice try.  My all natural diet didn't go so well either.  Too much change gave me abdominal pain for months.  My sister's divorce has been painful to watch.  I'm hoping the new year has better things for her.  My brother's surgery was a success.  The entire tumor was removed and was not cancerous.  He has a long recovery ahead.

At the beginning of this new year, I'm already focused on how it will end.  I want to remember all the good that I possibly can.  I remember major events from last year, but I know there were lots of little things that made every day special.  So, for this year I have created a Happy Thoughts jar for my family to write down little things that make us happy.

I painted some labels with several coats of chalkboard paint and let them dry.

Then placed two labels on an empty candle jar and wrote Happy Thoughts on it with chalk.

I'm excited to watch the jar fill up.  I hope I'll need to get a bigger jar.

Holiday Parties for the Introvert

Is Christmas over yet?

It seems that I have been involved in some Christmas celebration at least twice a week since the beginning of December.  Don't get me wrong.  I love Christmas.  I love spending time with my family.  I love the special music and services that celebrate Jesus' birth and all that it means for us.  I love the lights and the ornaments.  And, honestly, we don't go all out for Christmas commercialization.  We buy gifts and put up a tree but we're tempered folk.  Nothing is extravagant or flashy or overly expensive.  But the one thing that really wears on me is the expectation to be involved in every social event going on!

Since the beginning of the month we have been in two performances of a Christmas drama, participated in numerous choral and musicians practices, performed at a Christmas community night and a Christmas service, helped with a Ladies' Christmas party, gone to homes for cider and sweets, exchanged gifts in our home, traveled to exchange gifts with other family members, and after the holiday was over, attended a church Christmas party last night.

I don't know how people find so much to talk about at Christmas parties (or parties in general) but there always seems to be a continuous din of chatter. I get lost in it.  I certainly don't feel the need to add to it.  But being the only person at a social event that isn't socializing makes you stand out.  And standing out isn't what I have in mind.

I usually try to find a quiet corner (quiet being relative in this statement). And if I can find a book to go with my corner, that's more ideal.  At least then I'm engaged in an activity and wards off attempts to drag me into the cacophony.  But it's better to go prepared, so I bring my own book.

Introvert problem #1 - Finding enough room in your purse to tuck a book... 
Or two.

Bringing a book to a party causes another dilemma.  Someone might ask what I'm reading.  For someone like me, it's not a conversation I enter into lightly.  I tend to read non-fiction.  Mostly psychology, self-improvement, and finance.  So, really, unless you're willing to go into a deep theological or theoretical conversation, I'd prefer you don't ask.  I choose books with boring titles for this very reason.

I have to say that at last night's festivities, I was saved from having to retrieve my book.  In a far corner of the farthest room was a small table with a puzzle in the works.  There was enough room for 3 or 4 people to gather around.  Ahhh! My refuge!  When I took a seat, a few others gathered around.  We concentrated on finding the right match, we helped locate elusive pieces, we celebrated every success.  There was no call for small talk.  When the noise around us got louder, we huddled closer.  Others thought we all liked the same hobby, little did they know we were really just introverting.

That puzzle table was the most exciting part of the party for me.  I enjoyed every moment.  So here's a plea to all you extroverts and party-throwers.  PLEASE provide a puzzle table at all social events!  It makes it so much more comfortable for quiet people.  It attracts those who shy away from small talk.  And it's a lot less awkward than pulling a book out of my purse.